Menunggu Orang Lain!

Saat seperti ini memang menyebalkan dan sangat menjengkelkan karena aku harus menunggu orang lain yang jelas-jelas tidak bersedia bekerja.

Ketika diminta datang, tak datang-datang juga.

Ketika akhirnya datang, tak membawa persiapan seperti yang diminta.

Kenapa sampai tidak menjadi kesal dan jengkel?

Bahasa seperti apa yang harus digunakan untuk menyampaikan maksud kepada orang-orang ini?

Apa harus memanggil orang tua dengan sebutan yang terkesan merendahkan? Atau harus menjadi orang yang "pengertian" atas kondisi "kekurangan" mereka?

Tak mungkin aku yang harus mengerti karena mereka menerima pembayaran untuk menyelesaikan tugas tersebut. Atau harus aku yang mengerjakannya? Hanya demi atasanku mendapatkan peningkatan angka yang bisa digunakan untuk menyenangkan atasan?

Atau aku harusnya melihat dari perspektif bahwa atasan tidak peduli detail dan hanya ingin hasil? Selesai sekian banyak dokumen, tercapai sekian banyak target, dan semua atasan senang? Pekerjaan yang menjengkelkan dengan posisi yang tidak menyenangkan. Tapi sepertinya semua harus ditelan. Demi gaji tiap bulan.

I Guess That's One Down

There's a lot happened already. Problems, problems, and more problems. Hurt my head. Hurt my feelings. Nothing positive coming out of this. Some of the times I felt worse because actually I am fooling others, I am fooling myself, and I am fooling God. At least the latter part, I pretend to be fooling Him.

So that's it. After years of working and splurging, experiencing a lot and missing a lot more, high times and low, I am officially broke.

That one experience alone is worth more. I know how helpless one could feel about that. How much money can influence the quality of my life. How was it affecting me, my choices, my actions, etc.

From training myself to be more positive and outwardly, it changed me to the extreme reversion. Such is the power of money. I hope I would never be encountering the same problem again or else I'd be losing my sanity [hyperbole intended].

After -- at least I think I did -- tackled that one problem down, I have another one: to change my spending habit. This one is really hard and I mean, REALLY HARD. I hope I could, though.

While I'm at it, I guess the other one is to confront the result of my own doing a few months ago. This one is as hard as it may be.

God, help me to be able to speak this one out.

Tracking Your Money

Somehow I stumbled upon Buxfer, an online account/financial manager application (or I thought it'd be). I signed up using my google account and start using it by entering the current status of my bank account; some previous transactions; and the amount of money left in my wallet.

The application then showed my expenses categorized by my tags in a pie chart so that I could see easily in which post I spent really were.

I wish that I have had this application like eight years ago, about the time I started keeping record of every transaction I made, thus I could manage my cashflow the way it should be managed. Although I haven't the slightest idea about how this website would became, just let me entertain some thought that I'd became a smarter person in managing my money (provided that I faithfully kept entering the data to the application).

Anyway, since the site can not access my REAL bank account, I felt that my money is safe in my bank AND my wallet.

Cheers to Web 2.0!


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added: Oh yes, you can sign up using your Facebook, Yahoo!, Google, MSN Live ID, and a couple other account that I didn' familiar with.