Day 270: Life Is As Good As What You Make Of It

It is two in the morning and everybody's asleep. Well, that's almost everybody, because if you can read this post that only mean that I am not sleeping, not yet, anyway. I did not want to sleep because when I sleep it will be Your face that I see, it will be Your face that I will be dream of. So, instead of a slumber, I chose to keep myself awake.

Someone I overheard saying that Life is as good as what one would make of but maybe I just didn't buy it. I mean, if there's always this perpetual feeling that things could be -- or should I say must be -- getting much better, why does it seem that for me at least that everything has come to a halt, being stagnant (if I couldn't say that it's getting worse and worsen), depressingly routine. It is hard to believe and hold on some optimistic point of view when every facts you have point on the other way.

I shouldn't be saying this -- or in this case, wrote about this -- but this need to write something on this wee hour is so great that I must write. Something. Before I will myself to sleep. Facing You again, in Your own domain, Your dwelling place. And there is nothing that prepare me to another encounter with You.

There is light and there is Light, but there is Dark also.

I just don't know what You represent. Not yet, anyway.

Day 220: Saturday Night Fever, or Day -6

My sore throat got worse. Maybe because of my diet. I am stupid but it's kind of hard to find enjoyable gourmet here. Less than a week and I'm off! Yet my condition is getting better then worsen again. I don't know what my body really want but right now I'm sure I could use some bath and soap.

Huh? You don't get my point?

I'm sweating like a pig a couple of times today and the shirt I'm wearing keep getting wet and dry alternately -- so now you could imagine the smell.

Why I'm not getting myself bathe yet? I just got lazy.

And to remember that this is a Saturday night, when all people seemed to be out to get some fun, here I am slumped on the couch typing this post and feeling miserable about my body and the fever that grips it dearly. I got the August edition of MAXIM Indonesia but seeing the photos taken by the experts there made me green with envy.

Ah, better read something that got nothing to do with photography.

Day -8 Another Bad Luck

Looks like I am down with a fever right now. A nice and friendly fever that hold on me so tight I can't think clearly due to asphyxiation.

Ha! I bet you had to open dictionary on that one word!

Not a good sign at all. A lot of work and so many things to do and yet here I am writing this post while trying so damn hard to think of projects' documents that seemed very keen on practicing ninjitsu by disappearing! Been a long time ago that we done some of the projects and a lot have changed so now when all those things suddenly trusted upon me to carry on and finish them, I gagged.

Crap.